In December, a 2″ mass was removed from my abdomen (benign). This month, I’m back to playing 1.5 hrs tennis – two to three times a week. Wow. Thank you Vitality Back! Anyone wanna come hit balls with me?
Archive for the 'Personal' Category
— Update — Done! —
Hi, so you want to find something I wrote?
As of today (October 13), I’m reorganizing my nearly 10 years of posts (holy cats, has it really been that long? ugh.)
Give me a few days. I’ll get it done.
— Update — Done! —
Hugs to you,
Tags: Healing Adrenal Exhaustion, Healing Adrenal Fatigue, health, Personal
Jody emailed me asking for more info about my current protocol.
Here’s a general overview, with a few random details – I could practically write a book about all of this. I admit it’s not my most brief writing.
I hope it helps someone out there anyway.
I am totally bedridden and no doctors have been able to help me. I have read your postings extensively and I’m hopeful that you might email me the more recent Protocol that you followed to help you feel much better.
I really appreciate any response from you,
- Blood tests (many different ones) to get baseline information
- DNA test confirmed I had MTHFR mutations effecting metabolism
- Begin to Heal vitamin, mineral and micro-nutrient Deficiencies
- Learn how to properly maintain balanced electrolytes
- Clear out detox pathways to prepare for detoxing
- Begin to slowly add in co-factors necessary for later steps
- Begin simple stretching / easy beginner yoga to help circulation clean gunk out
- Detox parasites – Cure systemic bacterial overgrowths / infections
- Heal the gut biome with proper types and amounts of probiotics (many are not proper)
- Replace household products, body producs and foods that have toxins, carcinogenic substances, endocrine disrupters, … (sls, aluminum, “fragrance”, anything 3+ on EWG’s site) – use cleaner / healthier alternatives
- Upgrade supplementation to help support deeper healing processes
- Cure leaky gut
- Detox heavy metals
- Eliminate ALL sources of stress – “friends”, work schedule, horror movies, anything that stressed me out.
- Eliminate “inflammatory” foods and learn how to reduce systemic inflammation
- Eliminate American wheat from diet (glyphosate) and stop eating any GMO products (especially corn, soy)
- Sleep 8-10 hours a day starting at 10:30pm
- Drink only pH-balanced distilled water
- Eliminate problematic diet issues – for a long time I had to drop all alcohol, gluten, dairy, and tons of foods that were causing me issues
- Learn a properly balanced nutrient-dense meal-planning structure
- Learn how to deal with my genetic mutations effecting metabolism
- Slowly add in tiny efforts of 7-minute HIIT cycles, anything is good (ie: heal insulin resistence and restore insulin sensitivity to reduce hypoglycemia stresses)
- Get my systemic imbalances under control (as Dr. Lam says, the OAT axis – more in a bit).
- Slowly add in supplements specific to my body profile to support healthy function for my MTHFR mutations and adrenal fatigue and insulin resistance and estrogen dominance etc.
- Slowly re-grow mitochondria that were probably devastated, be sure other items stay in balance while adding new energy-producers to the body – they will consume more resources.
- Eat only organic, whole, live foods whenever possible, at least 6 fist-sized servings per day.
- As systems heal, you need less of some bits of previous steps, and more of others. Over time I could add allergen-foods back into my diet. I’m not so diet-restricted anymore. Over time I could take less of some supplements. I expect more resiliency to grow with time so I can wean myself off more of the (enormous numbers) of supplements I’ve had to take over the years.
- I sleep through the night – OFTEN
- Especially on good days, I can often do physical things for myself again – I can sometimes cook, clean my own house again, shop for my own groceries again – all things I could not do literally for YEARS.
- I’m getting my fibroids reduced and my menorrhagia under control – I bleed 1/3 as much as I used to each month, almost a normal (2-4 days heavy) cycle where previously it was 7-15 heavy days with no days off in between. I expect this to continue to improve as I do another cycle of the “fibroid heal” combo I am using.
- I can do bits of 7-minute HIIT workouts that I could do NOTHING of before
- I’m now bedridden roughly only 5-7 days a month, and up to 60% of my previous functionality on good days — where I had been bedridden for months at a time and extremely weak even when I was ‘better’.
- I have better diet resiliency – I can eat some of the foods I used to love, as long as I don’t overdo it or do it too often.
- My RLS symptoms are MUCH more rare and lighter now, and I usually can eliminate them within minutes (drink water, balance my electrolytes, take tissue salts, eat a bit of salt, or I need to eat a snack)
- My fall hay fever is far, far more mild, and I never get the complications I had in college (bronchitis, asthma symptoms, borderline pneumonia)
- My mood, mental clarity and ability to engage projects has improved radically
- I got a comprehensive nutrient panel – I had tons of deficiencies – iodine, zinc, B12, D, K, Iron, Calcium, magnesium, and others.
- I got a wide-spectrum food sensitivities and allergies test – turned out tons of my daily foods were allergens for me — rice, garlic, dairy, avocado, things I ate every day…
- I got a comprehensive stress-panel (cortisol, dhea, adrenal function), and comprehensive endocrine panels (estrogens, testosterone, much more) and found out that I had 3 systems in failure — my adrenal system, my thyroid system and my ovarian system (hormones) were totally out of whack.
- I got a DNA test for MTHFR and found out I have a genetic mutation that contributes to (so many issues I have had) – adrenal fatigue, insomnia, estrogen dominance that lead to fibroids, so much more. Turns out all these things were preventable if I had been educated by the right doctors 20 or 30 years ago.
- I also learned that some of my difficulties related to my previously diagnosed heart murmur – symptoms consistent with congestive heart issues (also MTHFR-related)
For what it’s worth, and with great vulnerability, here’s a node of my current bodymind puppetry. I’m posting this as a fishing expedition, because I’m feeling quite truly at my wits’ end. What do you think? Email me privately please. Mayagayam at gmail.
Once upon a time, the strategy was to land myself within a “co-created community of gnostic / priesty peers” – and if I couldn’t find it I tried to create it around me. But travelling the world I didn’t find it; my current energy levels limit most travel. Then I learned that to make community is too slow and too much wrestling – far more work than I want to manage, and takes far more directing / driving than I enjoy.
What was that strategy attempting to feed, anyway? This question brings me to this –
I am still dealing with this existential crisis – what do I do with the body to:
– care for my needs for belonging
– care for my needs for purpose (which would give me clarity and direction)
– provide for my needs for care, comfort and security for the body
– care for my needs for touch, sexual expression, and companionship
– care for my needs for community where I feel seen and wanted, met and appreciated, loved and desired
– care for my need to exercise the feminine and the capacities and the mystic and the I Am of me, in tandem with the body
– care for my needs for engagement and joy in my gnostic-heartful-sexy-playful-intelligent-tipheret ways and beyond
– all within a context of fluidity, ease, restfulness, balance and in integrity with myself
The answer to this would answer other questions like, “what do I choose relative to the other puppets I meet along the way?”
And, I’m aware that this is all fundamentally nothing more than puppet talk. I remember the conversation asking me to come here. Who sent me here to begin with and why?
— update, end of March —
Well in the absence of human response to this post, nonetheless the Guardians Guide. I find the answer is in the question itself. I read “Dragon’s Play” section 9, and I feel mySelf again. Thank you all for reading.
Tags: gnosis, On Spirituality, perception, Personal, perspectives, practical spirituality, transpersonal
I’ve just seen Tim Curry in Rocky Horror for the first time, and spent days basking in the companionship of the Gnostic, Kabbalistic, Hermetic esoteric message. I too remember doing the time warp into this rocky horror science fiction show for the thrills! And just recently, after years of wanting to return to the Trans-sexual, I saw blue skies through my tears, and decided I might actually like to stay. If you experienced this transmission from the movie too, let’s talk!
Tags: celebration, gnosis, transpersonal, wisdom
Me, two days ago, when I suddenly realized my en”light”enment practices and meditations and yogic practices (calling divine light into the body’s center channel) — were all toward me returning to residing as the state of consciousness (Ain) that existed before Creation (Ain Soph Aur and the The tree of life) – The state before creation was the Unity Plenum, the Darkness! (and God said let there be light). Which means that the light of life strives to return again to its origin of unity consciousness which was darkness… and the darkness seeks the companionship of other and duality and love and attraction and creation and life… From here – The Darkness is the ultimate beauty and wholeness, not evil, and the Light is the seductive temptress Aphrodite luring us into the flawed incomplete illusion (the naughty wench). Kether and Source as The Light Bringer (Lucifer). Suddenly the previous bad is the new good, and the old good is the new bad, until they spin in on each other and it’s all good and beautiful, and it’s all heartbreaking…The snake eating its tail… and suddenly I’m not in such a rush to escape “the prison” – What’s the rush? Wheeeeeeeeee!!
Tags: resolution skills
WE…don’t resolve anything…like This.
WE…Resolve things….when we sit Together….side-by-side…and ask,
“What do you Value?”.
Notice I didn’t ask, “What do you WANT?” Because if you ask a CEO what he Wants, and he says he wants a million dollars, well what if we don’t Have a million to Give him? We’re stuck and fighting again.
We ask, “What do you VALUE?”
Now if INDEPENDENCE is what he values, now we can find out ways to do That in a way that works for Everyone.
We Sit Down, and we Figure It OUT…