Posts Tagged 'healing work'

Your Unique Face of Spirit

Distortions and Faces of Love

(pre-requisites – needs consciousness, griefwork and releasework, aptitude to discern resolution vs residue, aptitude to discern strategies and core values)

Love – Needs

Attending to underlying needs is a path to reveal the true Face of Spirit.

(Not “meeting” the needs – Attending to them. Paying attention. Being with them.)

God is in the asshole; the needs are the face of One’s Divinity.

The needs are the path to the Face of Spirit.
Not the needs that are rooted in unresolved residue – those are distortions. Attend to them long enough, without diversion, and the residue will release and resolve.

The needs are the path to the Face of Spirit.
Not the needs that are unconsciously a means for other needs. I learned to contribute and be accomplishing and effective; unbeknownst to me that was a means FOR my needs for belonging and security. The “sin” (off center, off Truth) of expressing the accomplishing and effectiveness nearly killed me. The authentic expression of the yearning for belonging and security is, in this case, universal and Holy.

Attending to needs is the decendant path to freedom.

Decendant path to freedom

Residing with the need – attending to the need
sitting on the curb with it
that is Love’s expression

With Love’s expression, the need evaporates
there’s a fractional ego-death
and we become a more accurate expression of the Face of Love
we become No One (without ego)

Attending to the needs is a fractional form of re-membering

(We are not human beings having a spiritual awakening.  We are spiritual beings having a human awakening.)

And with a daily practice of fractional remembering,
the ego purifies;
This is spiritual hygiene.

When all is said and done, you will walk on water too.

Out of the Dark Night

Hi again 🙂

Well this post is about a month overdue. Much has shifted in the 6 months since my July post. Thanks to Grace and the love of people around me, including people I didn’t even know, I am finding my way into my next life Chapter.

I want to tell you the whole story, but if you know me you also know I can tell a long story. 😉 How do I abbreviate it and still transmit its richness?

Hrm. Well let me try this:

Have you ever had an experience of rediscovering the true core of who you most deeply Are, remembering, and suddenly shifting perspectives?

Before, all I could see were my crest-fallen memories and conclusions based in seeing the heart-breaking darkness in our 3-D reality: my disappointments, lost hopes and dreams, corruption, unconscious shadow, places where I felt lonely wanting to be wanted, and the beautiful fabric of Great Order that has tragic, limited, flawed messiness at every stage of Spiral development. From there, I didn’t see where I belonged, I only saw my differences from the world around me. Now, thanks to a conversation with Paul Roberts (http://www.effectivegriefrecovery.com), I remembered the quad inner community members that make up our dominant personality experience (see also, MBTI on human development), and was able to release my inner adult coach from the spaghetti of complicated grief that I was having a hard time finding my way through.

You see, Paul’s perspective was that all of what I’ve experienced this last few years – the losses, the health-crisis, the shift in my direction, the failures and the absolute feeling of being lost and confused – were all a necessary set of stepping stones, the oft-named “Dark Night of the Soul”, congruent with the path I have chosen. This made total sense to me. As so many before me who have climbed the mountain and seen the expansive view only to tumble back down into the chasm, I needed to have my tumble before I could fully surrender into my next Phase. I see how this makes absolute sense – I retired my busy-minded work. I let everything around me go in favor of prioritizing my body’s healing. Everything had to stop for me to shed my old skin before I could move forward.

From there, Paul offered me the Shin Buddhist invitation to surrender to the (2nd-person face of God) Amida Buddha which ironically (by contrast of my own 3rd-person relationship to The Universe) polarized me right smack back into my spiritual center. It reminded me that I Know mySelf as the direct conversation with Source that I Am. I Remember – I am not this experience. I gnostically Know – I am the rider, not the vehicle of the bodymind. (Yes, I just made up “gnostically” I think.) I experience the true details of the vehicle, but I also know a Higher Truth about my Nature, I remember who I was before I arrived in this body. That rider, and the driver that guides that Rider, is far closer to who I Am, than the illusion of the 3-D world that I fell asleep within.

This liberated me out of many entanglements that have been weighing on me for a few years now.

But maybe most importantly, Paul (and events that happened “coincidentally” right after my conversation with Paul) lurched me head-long into the deep pool on the other side of Great Order — realizing Grace.

Yes – there is darkness, corruption, shadow, tragedy. And, there’s also Great Love, surprises, unexpected support, guidance, beauty and consciousness evolving, taking Experience beyond where it has been before.

So now, I feel…settled. Rumi says it’s my natural progression from Enneagram 6 to healthy integration of Enneagram 9. I guess so; it snuck up on me. I see who I Am, who I am, and I see the differences between me and the environment around me, but yet I feel at home in my body and in the World and The Fabric just as it is.

In this shift, I’ve also uncovered a bit of love I had suppressed within me that I didn’t recall was there. I love mischief; specifically, the kind of mischief that happens behind the glint in someone’s eye as they smile with inner knowing, joy and delight at the fullness of having engaged a Random Act of Kindness. I love the kind of Mischief of engaging conversation with a restaurant waitress or a grocery check-out person or the mailman in a way that lights them up until they beam. I love the play of participating in standard daily conversation carrying with me the dance of Love and Divinity inviting forward the Genius that we each are, each in our own unique ways. I am a Stand for that game, that “good mischief” as Rumi says.

I now refer to it as my “Secret Light Spy” game.

So…

Thank you, Paul, for the gift of your random (or not so random) act of kindness that helped shed light on my unconscious confusion. Thank you, Grace, for sending someone into my field who I’d only met once 10 years ago, and for inspiring him to look me up, read my blog and decide to email me about my July post.

Thank you History, for all the ways I was supported, loved, guided, protected, fed, sheltered and richly, richly gifted even when I was too blind, swollen, arrogant, scared or young to see it.

And thank you, Grace, for answering my prayer; I needed a ‘bigger game’ to play, a game from the land beyond politics and local drama, and you’ve given it to me.

So there it is. So much to be thankful for!

I’m coming back out to play, y’all. Something beyond self-power carries me now. And watch out, there’s a mischievous glint in my eye.

Love,
Maya

Tapping Wave Energy

This is one of my journal entries.

If you’re interested in alternative energy research and builds, or if you’re interested in zero point, scalar waves, tesla tech, the science behind Egyptian pyramids used for energy, cymatics, off-grid self-sufficiency or free energy, I hope you’ll find that something in my notes inspires you or helps you connect some dots.

Blessings,
Maya

2013-04-28 Journal Notes on Tapping Wave Energy

Practicing – The Love of Fear

Extracted from my personal journal – unedited….

See also my post on 5 Ways To Get Free From Fear.

While most of my adult life’s practice has included leaning into fear, that’s been with the intent to eradicate it.

In this set of notes, it’s not about eradicating fear, but about embracing it, embodying it as Sacred Theater, and allowing myself to Have It.

Hope my notes support you as fully as this has supported me.

Maya

Notes from Fear realizations

This all started when Gareth sent me the quotes about Holographic Universe, reminding me to pay attention to the smallest detail as information.

When I asked what detail that was, the answer came, “I’m scared.”

When I explored the, “I’m scared. So what, how is that an insight into the greater whole,” suddenly all sorts of insights opened up.

Thank Goodness for Rumi holding container, feeding moments back, digesting them with me, and deepening the conversation of how to Play Fear as Theater…

NOTES:

– Make love to “scared”

– Invite her or she shadow expresses!

– my 6!! fear!! my kink…fear (somewhat)….my favorite holiday – halloween…. I am hard-wired to process Fear for the Great Body!

– Rumi – play lover to fear // Maya – play fear

– have “I’m scared”

– My fibroids, no competence — oppty to HAVE scared.

– Fear is Fire, it TEMPERS your steel.

– Can’t have duality without fear. Where there is position, there is love / cherishing and a desire for self-preservation. The opposite duality can feel like a threat to self-preservation. Fear is a face of love and cherishing for what one holds.

– Fear is a face of Love.

– There’s nothing to fear but the SUPPRESSING of fear.

– The ultimate war is Love vs/Fear. And you can’t have one without the other (like two sides of a coin). Fear is Love. Love breeds fear. Just like a coin, the only way to have equilibrium is to let them spin together, dance together. Like the coin spinning on the table, you find equilibrium in the middle of the dance where both faces of love have themselves and express themselves fully.

– Have “I’m scared” like a lover. Give the fear over to the Earth, give it down into Gaia.

– Do Theater of Fear as a vehicle for letting Her have Her Self expression.

– Love / Heaven. Fear / Hell / Hell Fire!

Neo… Wakey Wakey (Play)

Neo, it’s time to wake up.

Level 1
– Everything you resist in yourself or others is a reflection of unresolved pains within you – these are opportunities for freedom if you pay attention, find the source, and grieve. You’re always either doing love or fear. Fear often results from unresolved pain.
– Culture, relationships, organizations and our planet’s state of “reality” are a direct reflection of your work – every one of us.
– Today, this very moment, things are changing. We’re taking responsibility, and we’re cleaning up the muck.
– The American Dream – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZPWH5TlbloU
– Meet Your Strawman – http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ME7K6P7hlko
– Thrive – http://www.thrivemovement.com/the_movie
– Kelly – http://www.abodia.com/f/Free-Energy-Devices.htm

Level 2
– Who’s at the source of our mostly-inactive genetics? Lots of muck stems from this. Wouldn’t it help to know how we got here in the first place? Research pre-biblical text references (Sumarian texts, for example) about the original flood story and genesis, and the Annunaki. Soon we will all be discussing a very different perspective on ‘history’. Meanwhile here are other good related links:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_iuRNcRZemE
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YsvN1rUWoz8
http://thetemplateorg.com/

Level 3
– I Am You Are God having a Human experience.
– I Am You Are cells in the being of God – and as such embued with the power of Creation.
– We create as we Think.

Level 4
– All things are as they must be – perfect – in the fabric of Great Order
– As God, all of this is Original Choice. There’s nothing to forgive.
– There’s nowhere to go, nowhere to escape to. All Is Breathing. Reunion, Differentiation, rinse and repeat. All of the stories are simply theater playing Experience out of this eternal breathing.
– There’s nothing to do but observe, trust yourSelf, Be true to yourSelf, breathe, and give Experience away to the Earth. Your body will all dissolve into dust at some point anyway. Life is all just practice for the Ultimate Dissolution into ReUnion. You might as well live from your love, because nothing else matters. Everything else finds its way when we are each true to the GodForce within us revealed by our surrendered, clear love. If you don’t truly love it, don’t keep it, do it or be it. Just let it go. That’s all.
– Return to Level 1 or take a nap. Or have a cookie.

Have a great day 😉
Maya-G

Gentler Perspective on Jealousy

Today I saw a post someone wrote – an ad – saying, “Jealousy is the inability to appreciate what we have.”

I invite us to this kinder, more compassionate perspective –

Jealousy is the pain we feel when we have not yet acknowledged and resolved the ache of a deep unfulfilled yearning we have inside.

With releaseful self-empathy (mourning the gap between what we want and where we are currently), we get relief from the ache of unfulfillment, and our ability to be grateful and have Compersion (joy for others’ joy) naturally surfaces.

Jealousy is a symptom that there is something in US that WE have not yet cared for and fed properly.

With love and blessings,
Maya

The Queen of Shadow Work

Today a friend called me “The Queen of Shadow Work”.

I didn’t know what to make of that at first, and then I realized, “I could own that. I am that!”

I can see where it’s true that I dedicate my life and energies to shadow work and skills for developing the self-line:

– I have a bullshit meter a mile long that sees when people are operating out of bullshit
– I have a set of skills I practice daily toward cleaning up my own shadow and developing my own self-line – this is my life practice
– given my childhood I needed a ton of healing, shadow work, skill development and practice – so I’ve got a ton of experience doing it
– I’ve been offering my best proven practices to others in my coaching and in my Coach Certification program for over 19 years.

Would you find more freedom or power by doing shadow work?

Self-Line Self-Test

Here are 8 ways to know if you have shadow work to do:

– Is there something you want to experience but think you can’t, or think you can’t talk about?
– Do you have unresolved conflicts in your life, or relationships in your life where you choose to bite your tongue rather than speak your truth?
– Do you have some unresolved childhood or adult trauma?
– Are you keeping some big, dark secret?
– Do you ever argue with yourself or with others?
– Do you have a pain or frustration that recurs in your life?
– Are there any areas of yourself, others, culture or humanity that you avoid or stay away from?
– Do you ever have moments of emotional trigger, judgment, irritation, resistance, defensiveness, or contraction?

We ALL have more shadow work we could do, or we’d all be enlightened beings already walking on water.

If any of the list fits you, and if you want more freedom, more peace of mind, and more power in the we-space of your world, shadow work and skill development can help you.

Let’s face it, no one teaches this in school, and yoga, mindfulness and meditation practices simply are NOT enough.

Mindfulness and Meditation Aren’t Enough

Have you ever met anyone who could go do yoga, meditate at 7am every morning for an hour, and still not work out relationship issues? Have you ever met someone very skilled at mindfulness who still gets irritated and frustrated and caught up in the same issues over and over again?

For those of us who think our mindfulness and meditation will save us, that’s not enough. At best, these ascendant practices are only 1/2 the work.

At worst, they are just Spiritual Bypasses.

Sitting on a cushion isn’t enough. Sweep life under the carpet, and life will keep coming back until we address it. While we don’t practice effective we-space skills and clean up our we-space residues, we continue to carry them.

Mindfully stepping outside our issues and observing them, alone, will not free us. Observation and objectification of life is a great pattern interrupter, but like it or not, we are spirit IN A BODYMIND, so we also need to also integrate practical, daily habits that cultivate the kinds of experience we want.

The spiritual bypass of thinking “thoughts are things”, alone, will not free us. Our ability to manifest experience what we DO want is only as powerful as our practical habits to generate what we want and be free from habits that cultivate what we DON’T want.

The spiritual bypass of sitting as gurus on mountains or well-cultivated practitioners in our isolated communities is not enough and will not free our planet – we are all interconnected. World circumstances increasingly require us to wake up and pay attention to each other. Wars in other countries become our wars. Illnesses in other countries become our illnesses. Economic issues on Wall Street change what happens on Main Street, affect jobs across the nation, and impact economies around the globe.

What Next?

If we’re not doing spiritual bypass, what do we do?

In my work I offer proven practices for shadow work, for developing the self line, and for freeing ourselves from the conscious and unconscious fears that run our lives and impact our relationships.

For more information, call me at 914.882.9667 or send a blank email to mayagayam@gmail dot com with the subject line, “SUBSCRIBE” to get news about events and freebies I offer.


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